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Tuesday - March 2, 2021
Quad Cities USA - Guide to Davenport & Bettendorf Iowa and Rock Island & Moline Illinois
 

Serving Up A Column For People Hungry For Secret Information On Celebrities’ Lives

February 26th, 2021

What did you have for breakfast this morning? Orange juice? Me, too! Coffee? Me, too! Leftover pizza? Me, too! I guess there must be some special bond between us. Something unique. Something real. You know, I haven’t felt this way since I read that Charlize Theron likes to drink Red Bull — just as I do. I hadn’t felt that way since I had read that Sarah Michelle Gellar is a big fan of tiramisu — just as I am. Those revelations were important to me, my sense of identity and my sense of well-being because they gave me a tangible, iron-clad link to someone famous. And that, we all know, is... Read More

Soy Un Perdidor… It’s The Video You Deserve Baby

February 22nd, 2021

It’s Monday. The weather over the last week has sucked. Covid sucks. And in general you’re feeling like a loser. Well, DO WE HAVE THE VIDEO FOR YOU! There are certain videos and songs that are undeniably, indelibly, of their time, and today’s video is one of them. If you were putting together a time capsule of the early ’90s and Generation X (of which I’m a member, so I have a certain affinity), this video would be in there. The song, artist, and video so perfectly encapsulate the slacker smartass ethic of Gen X, even more so than Nirvana’s “Smells Like... Read More

If You’re A Human Being Living On Earth, You Need To Read This

February 19th, 2021

Welcome to the column for all carbon-based life-forms. If you breathe oxygen, this is for you. And if you live on a planet, especially Earth, well, then, you’ve come to the right place. Sorry, but I’m just following the new trend in advertising: casting as absurdly wide a net as possible. Products used to be advertised to a fairly specialized base. Each ad could be counted on to pander in its own unique way. You’d have your commercials aimed at seniors, in which someone sincere who was on TV when it was still seen only in black-and-white would give a testimonial about the product. Said commercial... Read More

Which Quad-Cities Area Is The MOST Sinful? The Results Are In, And…

February 15th, 2021

And now, here’s a survey that certainly would’ve been tipped heavily if the Yankee Clipper was still open and hadn’t been turned into condos. A new rundown of the Most Sinful States In The U.S. has been released by WalletHub, and given that the Quad-Cities straddles both Illinois and Iowa, we’re doubly impacted by the results. As it turns out, each of the 50 states has its own virtues and vices. Some of them involving Furries (ahem, South Dakota… Yeti fetish, much?). For example, Missouri has the worst drug use problem. And it certainly comes as no surprise that Nevada... Read More

Remember This If You’re Alone On Valentine’s Day…

February 12th, 2021

“Do you feel as depressed as I do about being single on Valentine’s Day?” A friend of mine messaged me this question the other day, and it got me thinking, “Am I depressed at all about being single this Valentine’s Day?” And it got me answering myself rather quickly, “No. No, I am not depressed at all about being single this Valentine’s Day.” Not in the least. That’s not to say that I’m a cold, heartless bastard with no sense of romance or desire for romantic love or a significant other in my life. But it is to say... Read More

Forget QAnon, Let’s Recall The ’90s Celebrity Who Admitted To Being Possessed By The Devil

February 5th, 2021

Between QAnon and the fashion return of flannel and ripped jeans, two of the hottest upcoming trends in pop culture seem to be ’90s nostalgia and the belief in a bizarre conspiracy about celebrities secretly possessed by demons. However, once upon a time, back in The Era of Cellphones The Size Of Bread Loaves, there was a celebrity who actually admitted that yes, he was once possessed by demons, although he was also cured. Odd? Odd, but true. The Lord may work in mysterious ways, but the the way the devil works is obviously just plain strange.  For example, God has been known to communicate... Read More

Rock Island’s Circa ’21 Premieres Filmed Bluegrass Musical From Feb. 6 to 28

February 4th, 2021

In a dark, uncertain time, Circa ’21 offers light and unadulterated joy in its latest online entertainment, the fun bluegrass musical “Big Rock Candy Mountain.” Fans of the film “O Brother Where Art Thou” and the Circa ’21 favorite “Southern Crossroads” should love this original musical – written and directed by Tristan Tapscott — that features such classic hits as “Big Rock Candy Mountain,” “House of the Rising Sun,” “Keep on the Sunny Side of Life” and many more. In the story set in 1932, a merry band of misfits sneaks into a theater hoping to stay out of... Read More

Davenport RiverCenter to Host Valentine’s Comedy Show on Feb. 13

February 3rd, 2021

Celebrate Valentine’s Day weekend with the “Love and Laughter Comedy Show” featuring Chico Bean on Saturday, Feb. 13, at the RiverCenter in Davenport (136 E. 3rd St.). Doors will open at 7 p.m. and show will start at 8 p.m. Chico Bean is best known as a cast member of the improv comedy show “Wild ‘N Out” and the podcast “85 South Show.” Anthony Jamal Bean, better known as Chico Bean is an actor, singer, writer, rapper, and producer best known for being one of the recurring cast members since Season 5 of the improv comedy show Wild ‘N Out on MTV, VH1 and MTV2. He is... Read More

Here’s Who Joe Biden Desperately Needs To Help During His Presidency

January 22nd, 2021

Like millions of other people, I watched the inauguration of Joe Biden as president this week, in part to see if Kanye West was going to jump on stage and claim that he should’ve won the award. But as I was watching Joe talk about how he was going to help millions of Americans in need, to help them get the aid they so desperately seek, I couldn’t help but think of one particular person I hope is rescued from her situation. That person? Taylor Swift. Oh, no, wait, not her. The person I’m talking about is, of course, Alice, the maid on “The Brady Bunch.” That’s... Read More

Famous Astrologer Says To Expect A WILD Inauguration Week…

January 17th, 2021

Anyone else got a bad feeling about this? Wednesday will mark the inauguration of Joe Biden as the 46th President of the United States, and all indications are that it’s shaping up to be a wild week and strange start to Biden’s administration — and it DEFINITELY will be, according to one notable Astrologer who has predicted the election win and other major events. “There are multiple things going on on inauguration day that are worth discussing, however I said this before, I’m particularly concerned first about the 19th and then the night of inauguration day,”... Read More