The Royal Family! Taylor dating Jen’s ex! Kanye West says something stupid! Ever notice that the more heinous things get regarding the economy, wars, presidential scandals, etc., the more intensely the media ignores the real news to concentrate on either celebrity scandals or deviant crimes? Sometimes I wonder if there’s a grand conspiracy regarding celebrities as well. What if celebrities are nothing but programmed Manchurian candidates, Stepford performers, who are hypnotized and controlled by secret government handlers who then program them to do silly crap to distract the masses every time... Read More

There have been a lot of horrible things going on in the news lately. So I think it’s time we had a difficult discussion on a sensitive topic that, quite frankly, I’ve been avoiding talking about for a while. No, not my relationship with Kim Kardashian. (Fifty feet MEANS fifty feet, Kanye!) But rather, the fact that Avril Lavigne possibly died (or was murdered) and replaced with an Illuminati body double. I know, I know, I know… you’re like, “Oh Sean, EVERYONE knows about that!” But what about the one or two Amish folks out there, who are just getting onto the... Read More

Mondays can be rough. And so, every Monday, we give you a music video. A fun, funny music video. Something that’ll make you smile, make you laugh, make you reminisce, and make you realize that back in the day, music video creators were probably either insane or heavily intoxicated. But were also incredibly entertaining. We call this feature, The Video You Deserve, and you can find it every Monday on your site for fun, free entertainment and features, QuadCities.com. Our latest video is another song that’s been resurrected by the popular app TikTok, although one much fresher than last week’s... Read More

Like millions of other people, I watched the inauguration of Joe Biden as president this week, in part to see if Kanye West was going to jump on stage and claim that he should’ve won the award. But as I was watching Joe talk about how he was going to help millions of Americans in need, to help them get the aid they so desperately seek, I couldn’t help but think of one particular person I hope is rescued from her situation. That person? Taylor Swift. Oh, no, wait, not her. The person I’m talking about is, of course, Alice, the maid on “The Brady Bunch.” That’s... Read More

Listen, I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking, “Wow! Taylor Swift just released a new album! I wonder which ex-boyfriends all her songs are about?” Oh, you naïve child. Taylor Swift’s songs have never been about ex-boyfriends, any more than Planet Ping Pong’s pizza menu has been about pizza. Of course, those of us who aren’t SHEEPLE all know Taylor (I can call her Taylor) has long been a tool of the Illuminati, and her songs have incorporated secret coded metaphors for the takeover of the world. “Blank Space?” About people having their memories erased and reprogrammed... Read More

Listen, I’m not going to say that Kanye West dropped out of the race for President of the United States just because I announced I was running. After all, I’m writing this, not reading it out loud. But I do find it coincidental that after I announced I was running for president last Friday, within days, Kanye suddenly dropped his 2020 campaign. Hmmm. Suspicious. Kind of like a lot of other behavior by famous folks lately. Perhaps you’ve been hearing about some of it. Certain big-name celebrities have been shockingly AWOL the past few months. Tom Hanks. Ellen DeGeneres. Pauly Shore. All of... Read More

Ok, so about 50 percent of you hate Donald Trump. And, about 50 percent of you hate Joe Biden. But, probably about 90 percent of you, whether you like his music or not, think Kanye West is pretty freaking insane. This week, Ye, as the kids like to call him, was more crazy like a fox with the brilliant public relations stunt of announcing he’s going to run for president. Never mind that he hasn’t formally filed to run, and never mind that he’s way past the deadline to do so or be on the ballot in a vast majority of states, so technically, he has no chance. The fact that he announced it at... Read More

The Royal Wedding! Selena dating Jen’s ex! Kanye West says something stupid! Ever notice that the more heinous things get regarding the economy, wars, presidential scandals, etc., the more intensely the media ignores the real news to concentrate on either celebrity scandals or deviant crimes? Sometimes I wonder if there’s a grand conspiracy regarding celebrities as well. What if celebrities are nothing but programmed Manchurian candidates, Stepford performers, who are hypnotized and controlled by secret government handlers who then program them to do silly crap to distract the masses every... Read More